hysteric

It’s funny how she has the ability to chuck a rage or give people the silent treatment with people actually trying to make her smile again. It’s funny how her unhappiness is always realised and people always try to help her. What makes it more funny is that, all I can do is keep in bottled up inside. How no matter how much I want to break down, I can only do so when I’m alone. Each day, I can feel a part of me dying and yet I can’t say a word about it to anyone. Why? … Because no one cares. I always restrain myself from getting angry or showing my depression because no one really cares about how I feel. So rather than having to face the brutal reality that no one cares, I’d rather just tell people I’m happy.

But for once it’d be nice for someone to see through me. I’d be nice to have someone who would bother to make me smile. I’m different to her. And I know the treatment I receive will always be different. But after a long time, it’s good to imagine that someone would actually care …. but I just can’t find anyone. Why bother ?