love is so bad

“Bad started off with the lyrics, ‘You became the reason I breathe, only to suffocate me.’ When I look back, it was the people I cared about most deeply that ended up hurting me most. Makes me wonder, though. Is it because they gave me greater scars? Or did I inflict the pain upon myself by naively expecting that they, of all people, would never be bad to me? These are the thoughts that birthed the song.” -- Tablo

finally

I finally understand.

Lately, I've been listening to a lot of ballads and reading a lot of lyrics. Previously, I would never search up lyrics because I could never relate to the lyrics of any songs. But lately, I've found myself more attached to certain songs because of their lyrics.

I finally understand how someone can cry from a song because of the memories and emotions that are evoked...

Today I fell in love with a new genre of music.

Initially, I was a big fan of ballads. I loved the fact that ballads were rich in emotions - emotions of drama and heartbreak. I loved the voices of ballads of ballad singers because they were so layered and had so much depth in them.

Indie on the other hand isn't as dramatic as ballads. It is the type of music that you enjoy when you sit on the couch next to the window on a rainy Saturday afternoon. It is not rich as ballads in the sense that it does not showcase extreme dramatic heartbreak and emotions. Rather, it sings to me as a subtle, haunting yet beautiful piece of music.

Ballads to me, is the moment of intense heartbreak, of intense clenching of the heart and constant overflowing of tears but indie to me is like...you've been heartbroken so many times and you think you've grown used to the pain but deep inside still lingers that pinch of feelings with tears silently falling down your face.

Yeah...something like that. Something beautiful like that.